Archive | March 2014

Eleanor’s journal entries 45 Tower mysteries revealed, part one

Suddenly the words and the visions overwhelmed me and became far too much for my untrained mind to keep up with. I was unable to filter them out seperately and they swirled together in a mass of scattered images and voices within my brain. I felt an unbearable pain that started in one spot of my head and quickly spread throughout my entire body. It was staggering breathtaking pain, the likes of which I had never experienced before. I collapsed to the floor in agony while Guinivere and Judith knelt next to me. Guinivere made attempt to ease the pain by soothing me into a semi-conscious state. I vaguely heard her tell Judith that it would be far better for me to absorb all of this in a sleeping state.

scattered images

I woke some time later to the two of them still leaning over me in great concern. They looked so worn and troubled that I knew I must have been unconscious for some time. I blinked to clear my vision and my thoughts before trying to speak to them. I was quite distressed by what was now a part of my memory and unsure of how to even explain or share it. I looked at Guinivere and Judith in some puzzlement and told them, “I believe I know now much of the story of the boys and of everyone else involved in it. It is as though I have absorbed the thoughts and events of so many who were involved in it… save probably the two who still wander here.”

Guinivere looked at me in her own puzzlement, “But, I do not understand… I thought this should have given us reason or answer to the boys, and to Anne’s connection to them.” She paused in some bewilderment, “Well, go ahead then, tell us of what did happen and mayhaps it will give us some sort of clue.”

I sighed in frustration, “Well, first I must mention someone did curse this place, everyone in it, all who were involved and their families… and she vowed to carry it with her for all eternity. And, as to the boys who wander still here… I believe they are truly just lost souls, unknown little boys unsure and unaware of their part or path.” My heart was much broken for these two small boys who now wandered the castle, not knowing where to go. I am quite sure that is was our duty to help these two boys find their way as well as to give them rightful and honourable credit and memoriom in this event which they had unwittingly become such a part of and ever remained unknown to any as anything but “lost boys”.


I vowed to see this through in order to give them their peace and their names back. For now though, I must share the story of all those others involved in the mystery. The disappearance of the princes turned out to be such a combination of events that the entire blame could never be placed upon just one person. In addition, no one could ever be convicted or judged of murder since no murder actually did occur. Richard III, having gotten a taste of power in his brief role as sole protector and regent of the young Edward, quickly realized that he did not want to envision giving up that power or control once Edward should reach an age of majority within a few short years. He also knew that Elizabeth would not give up her fight for control over her son. She had no real quarrel with Richard other than for the fact that he had been placed as regent rather than herself. She was not willing to give up her rule and reign easily… unless some possible better option was presented to her, or some worse fate threatened upon her. She had to realize that the people would never stand for her ruling alone or at this point being of any involvement in the new rule… the people did hate her that much by this time.


The rumors of her being a witch were abounding throughout the kingdom and in reality, she was lucky to have survived as queen as long as she had. It was not even so much that she might be a witch or a believer of old ways… it was her attitude and her ego that brought her downfall. The people had truly thought well of King Edward but felt he was too muched ruled by his wife. Elizabeth had forgotten from where she started, as commoner. Instead of being a much grateful and dutiful wife to the King, she became outspoken, and overtaken with her sense of power. She thought that because she was Queen, she could do no wrong and none should question her. She also forgot a very serious vow she had taken early on to those in a higher power of authority… when it was apparent that she might sit upon the throne, she had been called to a secret meeting of the Higher Council and been called upon to swear an oath that she would not use what ever powers she had for any influence or undue harm in any way. Over the years, her Mother had constantly reminded her of this oath and admonished her to take it seriously but her head reeling with the heady power she felt as Queen, she conveniently forgot about this oath. She would eventually live to regret that oversight.

As her husband, Edward lay dying, he knew well the feelings of his subjects for his wife. He realized that there was no way that the people of England would receive her as Edward’s regent. Though it pained him to do so, he made his wishes clear that his brother would take charge and rule until a time as his son could rightly do so. Richard understood as well, the reasons for this decision. When it was first put on him, he did not want the responsibilities and made it well known. It was not an act on his part. He knew that it would all most likely come to a very bad end… he felt it in his soul, which was already much troubled after the events with his brother George’s death.

He tried to set those doubts and misgivings aside as he took on this grave challenge of attempting to hold on to the throne for his family. His first fight, of course was to ensure the new young King Edward’s safety. He had to make sure that it was clear to all that the boy was in his safe keeping and custody, not his Mother’s. This was the first battle of many. Unfortunately for the confused young boy, he was viewed at this point in time more as propery than a frightened young boy who had just learned of his Father’s untimely death and his ascent to the throne. After all, possession as always was seen as 9/10 of the law. Who ever was in possession of the boy king held the control.

Woodville family

Strangely, as soon as the boy was in Richard’s custody, Elizabeth did not attempt a fight. She did much as she had done in the past, and removed herself and her other children to the sanctuary of Holy ground. She did so however, with a great amount of the Royal treasury… one third of it to be exact. The other portions were in her possession as well. Her brother, Edward Woodville who was Admiral of the Fleet at the time had a third of it in his possession when he sailed for France, then escaped to Brittany to side with Henry Tudor in his attempt to take the throne. His portion was never recovered and it was assumed it went to Henry Tudor’s aid. Her older son by a previous marriage, Thomas Grey, the Marquis of Dorset had the other third in his possession with him when he went into sanctuary with his Mother and his half siblings.

One would think that she would have remained at the royal residence to uphold her son’s claims to the throne, to continue at least to be a visible presence and reminder… and to be of solace and comfort to her son in such a grevious time for him. No one would have denied her that much and she would have been looked upon more favourably for that caring than for leaving him to his own fate and seeking her own protection. Many thought it unforgivable for her to take the actions she did, in taking the rest to sanctuary and leaving the boy to the wolves at their door.

Perhaps she had an inkling of what was to come… she must have trusted that Richard, as cunning and manipulative as she thought him to be, would never go so far as to actually put her son’s life in jeopordy. For all of her other faults, she was one who seemed to care deeply for her family. It was that concern and care for all of her family members that caused such uproar in the first place. She had a large family of many siblings as well as her many children. During her reign, she managed to ensure that all them were well rewarded with prosperous marriages, lands and titles. It was this that caused so many to look at her as abusing her title and her place with greed for more. She seemed never to be satisfied with what she had already achieved, but was continuously searching for more.

Richard was well within his rights to be concerned with what she might attempt. He did not trust her and held her partially responsible for the death of his brother George, although he knew too that his brother would never give up on his irritational thoughts and his own personal claims that he should have been rightful King.

Richard had easily won the first battle of gaining custody of the child and placing him in his protection. He did take that duty much seriously and endeavored to keep the boy safe, comfortable and healthy in his tower quarters. The boy was not mistreated, and he was much looked after in those early days of his confinement. There was some specualtion of the young Edward not being well as there were documented visits from the Royal physicians. Some of those reports stated that the child was suffering from some malaise and was much troubled. Of course he was troubled. Any person, much less a child would have suffered some troubles, worries and grief after such traumatic events as had just went on.

There were certain other documents that suggested the boy might be seriously ill… not capable or suitable to take over the reign. What ever the case, Richard was taking effort initially to prepare for the boy to take the throne. At some point during that time, he was of a changed mind.

It was most likely during this time that many high ranking noble council members who did not want a Woodville offspring on the throne no matter what, reminded Richard of a previous dispute. It wasn’t either a case so much wanting Richard ruling, but given the choices of two evils as they saw it, they opted for Richard. The earlier matter of a dispute over Edward’s marriage to Elizabeth being legitimate was once again brought to light, as were previous accusations of Elizabeth’s witchcraft.

A bishop came forward to attest that he had witnessed a pre-contract of marriage for Edward and Lady Eleanor Butler. That contract would have been viewed as legally binding thereby causing Edward’s marriage to Elizabeth null, and all of their offspring illigitimate. The only other person who could have disputed this was Eleanor Butler, and she had long previously died.

While all of this was taking place, Richard had also taken steps to remand Elizabeth’s younger son, Richard into his custody. His reasons were for the health and well being of the boy as well as the emotional well being of young Edward. If Elizabeth would not remove herself and her family from sanctuary then he would begin steps to remove the children from her. It would ease young Edward’s mind and heart to at least have his brother near him. He sent summons for the boy and made it clear that if Elizabeth would not release him willingly, he should be removed by force.

It may have been at this time that Elizabeth began to see she had much less power and control than she thought. She also most likely began to have troublesome fears for her sons’ safety. During this time, she came up with her own plans, which included included her daughter… She had heard rumors of Richard’s wife being quite sickly and had a thought within her to put forth another devious option should she have to. Her first concern though was of finding a way to keep her younger son safe and out of Richard’s hands. This plan would never have been successful had not someone else had their own concerns of safety for a child.


From the creator

Ok, I do apologize for the delay in updating! It took me much longer to put together these next portions than I anticipated. There was a great deal of additional research required. Each time that I thought I was close having it laid out, I would discover some other piece of information that needed more detail!

I had initially planned to keep this part of the story line rather short but my intense interest in the mystery of the princes of the tower won out! I expanded it to included much of the research and historical facts of the event. Once I had my historical facts, it took me some time to figure out a way to weave all of it into the story and maintain some actual facts within the highly fictional account! As I have mentioned previously, I did want to present the story and the mystery in terms that might have been in some ways remotely plausible if not probable? I did not want place blame on any one particular individual since we really have no true idea who was guilty. I also wanted to present some of the other people who may or may not have been directly involved in some way but may have stood to benefit from the event.

That all said, I hope you enjoy my version of what may or may not have happened to the Princes of the Tower!

From the creator

Just some notes of interest while I work on the upcoming episodes! Eleanor’s visions of what might have happened and who might have been responsible for the disappearance of the princes in the tower is inspired by my fascination… ok, obsession… with this mystery! In trying to incorporate this into my story line, I have spent a great deal of time researching the story, the events leading up to it, and some of the consequences and outcomes for those in any way involved in it. It is one of the few remaining real unsolved mysteries left in history! My research has provided a number of suspicious people who haven’t been associated with the event previously? Some of them may not have been involved in the actual event… and, there is doubt even as to what specifically the actual event was as no bodies have ever been truly identified and proven to be those of the missing boys. Because of this, I have been able to weave the disappearance of the princes into my story without destroying too much of the actual history of the events!

Some of my recent research included an easy read, but still quite interesting book by Mark Garber. In his book, ‘Cold Case Reopened’, he provided me with some new information and some additional theories on who might have been involved and how might have benefited them. The book is not from a historical view point, but a police investigator’s and profiler’s. His added information helped me to think outside the box and come up with my own somewhat plausible story of what might have taken place, who might have been involved and what their benefit or motive might have been.

It will take me a bit of time to get it sorted out and put together, but hopefully it will be worth it! I have found an interesting connection that will lead us back to Anne and her demise eventually?

Just a few previews of what’s to come:
The Castle’s secrets prove too much for Eleanor

One young boy is taken out in secret…

Another is brought in…

One last suspicious person lurks awaiting his fortunes…

Eleanor’s journal entries 44

Guinivere's guidance

My Mother became my teacher and my guide as we walked throughout the Castle. We stopped occasionally and stood silent as she instructed me to trail my fingertips along the walls, feel them and listen to the sound of the very faint vibrating hums coming from them. She explained that the sound was all of the mingled noises and voices captured forever in the stone. She taught me to clear my mind and imagine a blank white slate in front of my closed eyes. Her words were soft and gentle, calm but stern all in the same…She was guiding and easing me into a meditative state and stayed with me, encouraged me when my attention faltered away and the throughts strayed.

She spoke and placed a time to search in. “You must narrow your search to the time of the boys, 1483. Once that is clearer to you, then think of the boys in the tower, anyone who might have connection or thoughts of them or of Richard III at the time…” She paused, “Of course there might still be a great many thoughts by any numbers who had opinions or musings on the situation of the time. But, you should be able to glimpse some images or voices that you might recognize.”

Guinivere explained that part of the reason that I was suited to this journey was that I had been in this time and knew many of these people so would recognize some of possible importance in the images or the voices.

As she and Judith stayed by my side and kept me calm, I did begin to see images of some that I knew… at first they were blurred, much out of focus, and flickering. The voices were still a muted buzz of indiscriminate sounds. Guinivere told me to pick out one such flickering image and focus more intently on just that one.

Lady Margaret

I saw a glimpse of Lady Margaret and turned my attentions to her. As I concentrated on her, she appeared more clearly until it was as if she were in the room with us… but it was not here in the hall that she was.

I struggled to understand this and lost the image. Guinivere whispered, “Take a moment to regroup yourself, it was a trace of her you felt here. It means that she passed through this hall with her thoughts on this subject. Try to regain her image and follow her to where else she might have been at the time.”

I closed my eyes once more and thought of Lady Margaret. She came more quickly into my focus this time and I was able to do as Guinivere suggested. I followed her down the steps to the landing room. It was empty now but at one time, it held throngs of people, belongings and items going to and from the ships. Guinivere helped me to keep all of the many people and voices out and see only Margaret.


She was standing near the windows, looking out as if waiting for someone. I ventured to pick out her thoughts… Lord Thomas appeared, along with another man. He looked somewhat familiar. Perhaps I had been introduced in some manner to him in my childhood but at this moment I could not pin a name to his face. While Margaret stood apart, still watching out the window, Lord Thomas was involved in some serious discussion with this man.


Guinivere silently nudged my mind to veer to Lord Thomas’ thoughts, which she suggested would give way to the other man’s identity and purpose. The other man was Sir Robert Brackenbury, the Constable of the Tower. He was in charge of all that went on in the tower and held all of the keys to it. My mind was guided to pay much closer attention to them, to see if I could bring about their conversation of this moment. I could make out little of it, save for words from Brackenbury of some orders from Richard and an answer from Lord Stanley about the King’s meeting of which they were waiting on to see this matter settled.

I turned my thoughts back to Lady Margaret. She looked much in distress. A glimpse into her mind showed me a meeting between she and Queen Elizabeth and her young daughter. They were in the sanctuary quarters where Elizabeth and her children were safely residing for the time. Guinivere bade me follow that thought in Margaret’s mind to see what might come of it.


It felt as though now, I was in that apartment with them. It was quiet but for the soft strum of their voices. I stilled all other thoughts and listened closely. Their conversation became clearer but still difficult to understand as they were speaking quite softly.


Margaret’s words were whispered more forcefully, “I can do naught for you right now. I am but trying to save myself and my own family at this time. I have come only to advise you, upon my husband’s suggestion, to go along with what ever is put before you…” Her voice carried a harsh tone of bitterness, but also a hint of appeasement, “You must do what you feel you need be done, and all I can offer you is a promise of the future when I and my son have come through this ordeal with a crown on his head where it rightly belongs.”

Elizabeth’s words were harder to discern as she spoke in a much quieter and contemplative manner, “Ahhh then, I have much to think of now, do I not… Must put weight upon these options for all of us.”


The younger Elizabeth said not a word but appeared in some deep thought and condsideration of the intense discussion between the two older women. Margaret prepared to leave but had a warning, “I must take my leave, my husband keeps me under much guard these days and is waiting for my return. Richard will arrive soon and you must decide upon your course of action to safegaurd you and yours just as I have had to.” As she parted, she left a last comment, “Does it make a difference who wears the crown… be it a he or a she and if your and yours are all safe from harm?”

Margaret’s thoughts of that meeting faded and we were back at the window gazing out and thinking of the conversation between her husband and Brackenbury.


Lord Thomas was grim, “I like not any of this. I am in enough danger already, I do not need more of the like. I am telling you that he will not go along with this far fetched plan you have concocted in order to keep yourself safe and your consciense clear. This is a high risk you take and none will take kindly to you holding such over their heads.”

Robert Brackenbury responded in his own defense, “Well, I will not be a party to murdering innocent children of Royal bloodlines. I am of a mind that this will work and he will see it my way.”

Lord Thomas spoke in disgust, “No, you will not be a party to murdering innocents of Royal blood, you have no such qualms about some poor unfortunate serfs though do you?” He continued in anger, “I will admit that I have ever walked a fine line and even crossed it occasionally to benefit myself and my household, but what your are proposing galls even me.”

Brackenbury shrugged and replied, “These are treacherous times for all of us and we must take what ever measures need be to protect ourselves. I am of the opinion that this will set better with him than that of being outright repsonsible for the deaths of his nephews.”

Their conversation ended and their attention went to the young Elizabeth who had appeared in the room. I felt the hands of Guinivere and Judith squeezing mine tightly, as well as their thoughts focusing along with mine. We strained to hear the conversation taking place between her and Lord Thomas.

She spoke so softly, barely above a whisper, “Lord Thomas, I would have a word with you…” she asked and pulled him away from Brackenbury.

Lord Thomas bowed in respect to her, “Of course my Lady Elizabeth. I am at your disposal…”

The young woman glanced around to see if anyone was too close by before going on, “I would ask your sound advice on a matter of grave importance, I believe you know what it may concern.” she asked him and lowered her eyes to the ground.

Lord Thomas appeared uneasy, “I can only assume that it is in regard to the matters of which my wife spoke to you and your Lady Mother, the Queen.”

She nodded her head and kept her eyes lowered as she replied slowly, “I should know what gaurantees, what consquences there should be in recourse of my actions.”

Lord Thomas answered her in some firm words, “Gaurantees, my Lady? None of us has gaurantees of what comes next to us in life. All we do is put our foot forward with some hope, some faith and some luck that the wheel will bring us up rather further down… and that therein lies the consequences. If luck or faith not be with us, if we put our hopes upon the wrong turn, we shall surely be on the down turn, even it may look as though we could not go much deeper down than we already are. All I can assure you of at this moment is that, done properly, one way or another you would wear a crown.”

She was silent for a moment, then started to walk away but turned to reply, “Thank you, Lord Stanley. Though you skillfully avoided my question, you have yet answered it in your own fashion. You may tell him that I shall await him.”

Richard III

Eleanor’s journal entries 43

Judith and Eleanor in the hall
The memory faded… The Bishop was gone, as were Margaret and Thomas Stanley. Judith and I were left alone once again in the cold, empty hall. Judith exhaled slowly and tried to collect her thoughts and her emotions. Looking at her, I could tell it was more excitement than fear that she was attempting to hold in. I asked her about this, “What, You are becoming so used to my visions now that they do not phase you? Are you not concerned about what my mind may be hiding from us?”

Well, even if she were not concerned, I was… I was much afraid of what I knew, or rather did not know. I was somewhat saddened now too. I could not get past a hesitated worried thought that Lady Margaret might be as guilty as everyone assumed she was. I knew that many did not like her and would willingly cast blame upon her but I had always held in my heart that she had not done what they had accused her of.

Lady Margaret

Judith seemed to sense my disappointment and offered some reassurance. “Eleanor, this is no proof that she is guilty of anything other than some secret meeting with someone… we don’t know who she was with or what she was discussing. And, we don’t know anything about what her argument with Thomas was about, unless of course you can search back to remember more of that particular time.”

She looked around the hall in some thought and made a suggestion, “John and Gerard mentioned that you could possibly pick up on on other memories than just your own. I think the vision of the Bishop’s thoughts proved that. I wonder if, for now, instead of focusing on your own memories… let your mind free to wander and see if you can pick up images of anything else regarding that time here in the Castle, even if you were not here.”

That now ever present voice of my Mother inside of me smiled softly and I saw a pale hand reach out from me to gently stroke Judith’s shoulder. She whispered to me, “such a wise and clever lass she is…”
Guinivere's hand

Judith brushed at her shoulder and looked around the room, “I swear I just felt something touch my shoulder…” She sighed, “Well, I suppose as old and drafty as this place is, it’s probably the wind.”

The hand quickly retreated back to within me with a faint shimmering light following it. Judith startled and blinked, “Did you see that? It looked like a hand floating there for a moment.” She rubbed her eyes and added, “Maybe this is a bit too much for me, now I am seeing my own visions.”

Guinivere comes from the shadow1

I tried to apologize and make some reasonable explanation but I has having difficulty understanding it myself. My Mother hushed me and I felt an odd sensation go through me in waves. There was a slight swirl of air around us that smelled faintly of lavender. Rather slowly, a form appeared next to us… she eased her way out of my body and stood between us. The first sight of her was clouded and dim. Though we were taken by some surprise, after all we had already experienced, her appearance did not cause us too much unease. At least we had some idea of who she was and why she was here. Judith was a bit unsettled but seemed to adjust herself quite well. My feelings were not any of fear or unease, but ones of lightness and joy at finally seeing her. The lightness flowed through me and caused me to flutter above the ground. The fairie blood within me was reacting to this occasion and I had little control of it.

Guinivere comes from the shadow

guinivere's arrival

It took my Mother some effort to collect herself and appear to us fully. She closed her eyes and held out her hands as if to steady herself. After a few moments she looked around, then reached out to us. She spoke in that soft accented voice that I had so quickly become accustomed to and fond of, “Ahhhh, Let me gather my thoughts but for a moment.” She touched my shoulder and looked at me with such an emotion that I had not felt before. It took my breath away to see her and to truly feel her touch.

She reached out to Judith, “Please allow me to present myself, I am Guinivere, Mother of Ainor…” She halted and smiled, “Accch, I forget myself and my language. Tis Eleanor that she is called by now. You must forgive me, my mind is still cloudy.” she held out her hand to Judith as she continued, “I must thank you for your care and your kindness to my daughter. You are a fine and true friend and I am most grateful that you have come into Eleanor’s life. She needs those such as you surrounding her.”


Judith seemed at a loss for words or comment. She was stumbling for a reply and admitted it freely, “I uhhh, I am at a loss for words right now. I’m not even sure how to put this but, ummm who are you? I mean I know you’ve told me your name, but now I’m wondering…” Judith was rambling in some confusion.

Guinivere laughed lightly and patted Judith’s arm. “Ohhhh, tis a very long story of who I am or was. One we have not enough time for right now.” She gave Judith a look that said wait, then surprised her with another remark as she stroked her hand, “Ahhhh my Lady Judith, you will give your Eric my fond greetings whence you see him again?”

This comment startled Judith away from who Guinivere was, but to how she knew of Eric, and her relationship with him, “Oh, How on earth or heaven could you know that?
Judith blushed a bit as Guinivere laughed and replied, “Well, tis much ease when he seems to be such a constant thought ever running through your mind.” She sighed, “Hush, we shall find time for that later. Now, our task is to aide my sweetest Eleanor.”

She stood close to me as though she could not part too far away. I felt her soothing presence within and around me, and inhaled the deep scent of lilacs and lavender from her. There was little need for words between us as I could still hear her voice within. When she spoke, I knew it was more for Judith’s benefit than mine…she could have easily shared all I needed in a moment of thought with me.

I had a thought concerning Judith’s earlier question of who she was and was given a reply equal to the one she had given Judith. She calmly, yet firmly answered me in thought, “Hush, I am your Mother, and am here to help you… that is all that is of need or importance right now.” She sensed my somewhat childish beginnings of an insistance on knowing and cut it to the quick, “Enough, Ever the stubborn babe you were and still are. You will have these other answers when you have need of them.”

I sensed in her as much stubborness as was within myself. I also sensed that as fragile as she might appear, she was far stronger than her almost transparent wings gave illusion of. She wave aside my thoughts and spoke aloud to share her thoughts with Judith.


“Judith, you were much right in your thought that Eleanor can see what has happened here. It is a matter of wanting to see it and focusing on it.” She place herself between us once more and held out her hands. “There is nothing to fear, this is but a vision of the past events of this place. It is the energy and the secrets that the walls of this Castle hold. If you focus and concentrate completely, Eleanor, you will be able to see those people who left their imprints, their words and their lingering thoughts here.”

Judith questioned this, “But, there must have been hundreds, thousands, even countless more than that of people passing through here. It would be impossible, wouldn’t it, to pick out any one specific person, event or thought.”

Guinivere agreed, “Yes it would be an impossible task to attempt to seek out a vibration in such a vast amount, much like how do you say, Looking for a needle in a haystack…. a face in a sea of thousands of unknowns.” she paused for a moment and motioned for us to walk with her through the halls. As we walked, she went on, “Or perhaps, one connecting, unbroken thread in an intricate tapestry, such as life is.”

tree of life

She stopped and turned to us, “You must do as you do any other kind of search. You must narrow your search to what it is you are looking for in all of that unknown noise, and focus only on that. Eventually, the other noise and vibration will subside and you will see a clearer picture, hear a distant voice come closer.”

I was bewildered now, “I do not quite understand all of this. I am not sure what you are suggesting to me, nor am I sure that I have any skill that would allow this.”

Guinivere hugged me close and responded, “Eleanor, most people have a limited amount of such a skill. That is why at some time you might enter a place, feel such a slight momentary vibration, hear what you assume to be faint buzzings or even on some occasion, hear a very distant and muted voice. Some very rare and unique individuals such as yourself, have a far more attuned and innate ability. You just have never been trained or taught to make use of it. The skill is there within you waiting for you.”

I looked at her with much doubt, “John, and Gerard as well have made mention of my abilities but I am not so convinced. How do they know I possess these things when I do not know myself.”

She smiled and made effort to reassure, “Because they have powers and abilities of their own and can sense abilities in others of a like kind. But, even they are not aware of the extent of your untried and untested skills.” She held her hands out to me and closed her eyes. Her face looked troubled, “My Dearest Ainor, I wish that we had time together when you were a child, to train you properly of your place in the world, in the universe…I wish we had more time now, but alas, we do not. There is much amiss in that future world you have arrived in, and much of it has to do with events within these Castle walls. The persons causing the damage are still out there plotting something and we can not know who, or what until we unravel these mysteries. You must trust me for now and take what guidance I can give you in this matter.”

Judith was worried now, “I understand some of what you’re saying, Lady Guinivere… But, why can’t you see what or who it is? Surely, you have your own powers and abilities to see things.”

Guinivere shrugged and shook her head, “Everyone has different skills and abilities passed down to them in their bloodlines. As bloodlines mix, the traits change. Sometimes, they disappear and lie dormant within us. Other times, one inherits a trait or skill thought long gone. Tis such with Eleanor… she has inherited traits from far in our distant past and they are much stronger than any realize.” She looked at me again with a fierce pride, “You, Eleanor are a unique blend of all the past and the present. You are a key to the future.”

Guinivere let go of my hands and briskly set aside her softer emotions, “Now, enough of a Mother’s delight and pride in her offspring. We have much to accomplish and, I feel not so much time to complete it. I feel another storm approaching in the distant.”

Eleanor’s journal entries 42

The sight of the Bishop, even after these many years, still caused me to intinctively cross myself and shake in some leftover fear. It was not that he had done anything in specific purpose to to me personally to cause such fear. It was more of the knowing even as a small child, the power that he weilded with his rank in the church. During that time of my childhood, and indeed for so much longer, the church held as much power or possibly even more in some ways that the King did. They were as involved in the politics of ruling as any other factions and often had more power and funds to back their agendas than any other parties. Even as young as I had been, I knew that the church’s edicts and decisions were not to be argued with. I also knew that they could be as untrustworthy as most of those others in power.

I edged myself back against the wall, and pulled Judith with me as I whispered, “That is the same Bishop who signed the betrothal documents between Edward and I.” My heart beat was racing and Judith hushed me as she put her ear closer to the door in attempt to listen to his words.

Judith and Eleanor in the hall
My years of church training made me try to pull Judith back, “No, we should not be listening, we should not be privy to his confessions to God.”

Judith ignored my pleas with her usual rational answer, “Shhhh, Eleanor, if that’s what he’s doing then maybe we’re suppose to hear it. Maybe this is a distant memory locked within you and you heard it before as a child but didn’t understand it then.” She pulled me closer to the door then pushed me a bit forward as she whispered on, “I think this is all in your memories. I think you’ve been here more than you remember. But, now you must remember.”

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I heard that other soft voice from within me, “Go on, sweetling, do as she bids you…there is nothing to fear and nothing that can hurt you. You must do this, you hold the keys and only you can unlock the secrets.”

Judith held me from the outside whilst my Mother held me from within as I stepped forward and opened my mind to some well hidden past memory. The Bishop’s words became clearer and I heard him asking God for understanding and forgiveness for his many transgressions of late. I felt as guilty now as I had back then, standing behind the door hearing his private conversation with his God. He was apologetic in his words and kept insisting that his intents had never been for such wrongful purposes. He vowed remorse for any actions which God should deem as sinful such as allowing the man to meet his death in a vat of wine. He knew that was wrongful but tried to reason to God that he was walking a fine line of balance as were all of the others in this court. He justified the action by going on that it had been King Edward’s decision and his brother Richard’s to let their brother, George meet his death in such a way as he saw fit. He was after all a convicted Traitor to the king even if he was the king’s brother.

I stood there now, understanding what I had not as a child… This Bishop had had a direct hand in the odd execution of King Edward’s brother, George. Now, I watched him as he knelt silently for a time. I knew he was not finished yet.


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A horrified shock went through me as I saw not only my own vision and memory of the Bishop at the altar, but his memory of the event of which he had participated in. I had to struggle back a sickening gag before it faded and I went back to revisit the memory of my eavesdropping on him in his confession. It had been another trip here with Lady Margaret. We had come again in some secracy and she had bade me to wait out here in the hall for her with strict instructions to behave myself and not cause anyone to notice me. Her manner had been more agitated than usual that day and she had simply said she had a matter to attend to and should not be long.


That statement had been untrue. I had stood out in the hall for much of the afternoon,waited upon her to return and dared not to call attention to myself as per her warning. When the Bishop had entered the Chapel, he had left the door ajar and I could not help myself but to peer in out of some curiousity of what he might be doing. Twas then that I saw him kneel at the altar and sink himself into prayer and confession. I knew I should not listen but could not help myself in that either, being an inquisitive and curious child. I thought his confessions would not be of anything of interest… as a child, I assumed him to be above the transgressions of the rest of us.

I listened, partly because I had naught else to do at the time. As I overheard his long ramblings, I did not understand all of it or it’s possible importance. His confession concerning George had been of some interest and entertainment… of course I had known of the man’s treason and his death but as a child, I had not been privy to how he had died. I thought it quite strange that a man should choose to drown in a vat of wine as his way of atoning for his sins.

I had waited near the door and thought perhaps the Bishop had fallen asleep whilst praying. He was so long silent, and I had seen others nod off to sleep whilst they should be worshipping or in silent prayer. I was bout to wander off when I heard him moan. It sounded as though he was weeping… though, that could not be so, could it… I had never seen a grown man do such as that. So, naturally, I thought it was a sight of some interest and I returned to my hidden spot behind the door.

I heard him go on about how if he should be called to meet his death because of these actions being carried out by those he could not control, he wanted God to know that he was not to blame. He did not trust anyone these days and least of all those witches. He wanted God to know that he had tried to follow his principles in all things and the fate of these boys should not be on his shoulders but on those who he was sure God knew of as the guilty ones. He swore to God that he had surely done his part to ensure that one of that Witch’s blood should not sit upon the throne but he brooked no part in the killing of innocent children.

My breath left me now quite suddenly. For now I understood of what he had been speaking back then. He knew something of what had happened or what would happen to the boys. As he fell silent once more, I crept away from the door in fear of only the words he had spoken of Witches. I did not understand the rest of it, but I did understand the reference to the Witch on the throne… Many had referred to Queen Elizabeth in that way, whether in a literal sense or as in describing her oft unfriendly nature. I knew that there was much unrest and disarray in our world at the time due to King Edward’s untimely death. I was not aware of much else going on as adults were keeping much silent in their otherwise easily overheard conversations about important matters.

Lady Margaret
As I backed away from the door and clung to the wall, Lady Margaret had returned to retrieve me. I had thought for a time that mayhaps she had forgotten about me, she had been gone so long. She was still much agitated and was nervously crossing herself as she appeared. Lord Thomas had met us in the hall then… I thought that somewhat odd since he spent little time with us. He spoke softly to her as we left, “So, it is done, you are finished with this now and will stay out of all of this.”

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She had nodded her agreements to him but I could tell she was keeping something from him. I could tell by her nervousness that there was something which she was hiding. I walked a few paces behind them and saw him pinch her arm none too gently and tell her more forcefully, “I said, You will remain out of this and call no further attentions to yourself or to any of us who might be jeapordised by your actions.”

She jerked her arm away from him and whispered back in a rather bitter tone, “It is done and I will follow what ever consequences come from it.” Suddenly she seemed to remember me and dragged me forward to walk between them as a buffer or shield… such was my role in life at that time.

Eleanor’s journal entries 41

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Judith and I stood out there in the yard looking up at those boys for some time while we tried to determine just what it was we were experiencing. The boys continued their play. No one appeared to be guarding or watching them. In fact, we saw no one at all but them.. nor did we hear any noises at all. It was as though we were watching them through a window. Judith was feeling braver than I, as she suggested that we venture inside. We whispered our thoughts while walking though the heavy, newly polished arched doors. Why we bothered to whisper, I do not fathom for it seemed the place was empty save us and those boys. Perhaps it was out of some instinctive cautious habit that we kept our voices low and our steps carefully slow.

I was the one on edge now, as something felt very strange about this situation. If it was a time slip and we had truly arrived in the past, this place should be bustling and filled with people wandering about. If it were a vision or memory, then the same should be true. I could not recall ever a time of the Yorks being here that the entire place should be empty. No, this was something much different… something I had no experience in dealing with.

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As I tried to search my mind for anything would give me a clue, Judith led me towards the chapel. She opened the door as quietly as possible and stepped in. On entering, all of her attempts at silence were forgotten as she gasped loudly in amazement at the cathedral like quality with which the chapel had been built. No expense had ever been spared in the creation of this chapel so many centuries ago. Judith tugged at my arm and pulled me into a seat at the back. This seating had once been reserved for the Royal family members. Judith sat there and exclaimed her praise of this place. “Eleanor, this is beautiful… it takes my breath away and leaves me without words.”

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I looked around the chapel, seeing nothing that I had not seen countless times before in my life time. I failed to see what she could find so awe inspiring about this relatively small and for the most part, unadorned chapel. I also felt a need to remind her of appropriate behavior, even if there was no one else here. I whispered to her, “Judith, I must advise you to keep your voice down… We are in a church, a place of quiet worship and contemplation… also a place in which one’s words can be heard quite clearly throughout.” I looked at her with some thought then added, “I was not aware that you were of such religious nature to take so much appreciation of these surroundings.”

Judith looked up at the balconies, then forward to the altar dias. She closed her eyes, sighed and smiled as she whispered, “It has nothing to do with organized religion but all to do with inner spirituality, with that place of contemplation you spoke of. I’m not one for structured, organized religion and never haved cared much about attending church for the sake of attending if you understand what I mean. But, when I enter places like this, I can feel the presence of a higher power within it.”

I sat there with her and thought about her words. I had never thought of it like that. I had always come into these places of worship out of a sense of duty, looked at it as a chore to be endured. As she spoke, I began to see this so often dreaded time and place in a new light.

She explained, “I can come to these ancient places of worship and not hear the Damning , Condemning speeches or sermons being preached but the inner voices and prayers of those who believed in something so devoutly and profoundly that they would endure those words in order to find some sort of peace and hope in a place such as this.” She looked at me and went on, “Have you never looked upon something while sitting here, tuning out the ever pious words being thrown at you, and just felt an inner peace. When the preachings stopped and a chorus sang, when the sunlight sparkled and glittered though the stained glass, did you never feel as though something touched your soul? Did you never venture in here when no one else was here, just to feel that again?”

She held my hand, squeezed it softly, “It’s not about the religion, about which is wrong or right to believe in, it’s about the inner spirit and the basic need to believe in something, to have faith and hope…”

She looked at me and her voice was soft, “That is what we need right now Eleanor, it never hurts to take a few moments to stop our thoughts and ask for some guidance from what ever higher power you believe in.”

I held her hand, bowed my head and closed my eyes. I did something that I seldom recalled doing in the past. I let down my guarded walls and asked those powers above to help, to show me the way, to guide me toward whatever purpose I was meant for right now.

As I sat there, I felt a calm come over me and voice within speaking to me… telling me to let go of the fear. It was a lilting soft whispering trailing through my mind. The voice was female, and sounded so vaguely familiar to me, as though I had heard it before but knew not where or when. I felt arms wrapped around me, comforting me and that voice crooning to me in an much ancient language that, though I understood it not all, I remembered hearing at some time before. I had some flash of vision… of being held tightly and rocked by this woman. It was such a distant memory that it was but a momentary glimpse of her looking down at me. Her bronze, flame sparked hair flowing wildly around us both… her pale transculent sking glowing and the most delicate transparent wings fluttering behind her. Crystal like tears dropped from her face to mine from eyes of such a sapphire blue that they sparkled.

The image disappeared but I was left with the deepest memory of a woman who called me daughter. I was an infant held in her arms as she wept and offered a whispered vow, “I shall never truly leave you my Ainor, my daughter, I shall be ever in your heart watching over you. Should you be in need, you have but to seek me in your heart, your soul and I shall come to you.”

I suddenly opened my eyes thinking for a moment to find her here with us. She was not, but her voice remained in my mind, “Hush my darling girl and I shall be with you through this.”

I sat up straighter, filled with an inner peace and joy. Judith stared at me in some surprise, “Eleanor, you are glowing like there is some light inside of you. You look different… you look content. Have you managed to find some inspiration here?”

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I nodded, not quite sure if I should share my experience, but too much amazed not to describe it to her. “Yes, I have found my inspiration, and I have found my guiding light.” I shed some tears as I told her of this woman in my heart, my soul who was with me now to guide me through this unknown. “For the first time in my life, I feel not alone. It tis different from John’s constant attempts to reassure me. It is a feeling that I can not explain in any words.”

Judith nodded, “You don’t have to explain it Eleanor, it’s a part of you that you have searched for and found, that is all that’s important.”

We got up and went to leave the chapel, thinking that our time here had been well spent. Standing out in the hall, we began to hear faint echoes, traces of voices around us. They were muffled and distant but were the first sounds we had heard since coming here so we quited ourselves and listened closely to try to determine where they were coming from. We edged back towards the chapel door near the altar and a voice became slightly clearer. Judith pushed the door open just enough for us to peer in. I held my breath as I looked in and saw the High bishop that I knew from my childhood knelt in prayer at the altar. I could not make out his halted words other than his muttterings of “God Forgive us all.”